While speaking to parents over the past fifteen years that I have been working with families, I have found a consistent mindset that traps parents and limits their success. They seem to think that since their family is in trouble, that there needs to be a complete overhaul of the family dynamics and that it has to happen fast.

Both concepts are cause for concern.

First, a complete overhaul is rarely necessary. Most parents need to start with a couple of small changes, and after a couple of months, they can make a couple more. Parents are a lot more likely to be successful with changes using this format.

The second concern is that changes must happen fast. Habits take time to form, and therefore they take twice as long to break or change. Take smoking for example. The first couple of cigarettes a person has, they cough and gag. If they continue to smoke, they become better at it. Now, how long does it take to quit this habit?

Here are some rules to remember:

1) Children and Parents do better with Structure.

2) Make small adjustments to the rules and your children will learn to accept them fairly quickly.

3) Be Patient. Give the rules time to work. Stick to your guns.
 

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Posted in Parenting Tips by Denny Strecker No Comments Yet