Dec 08
15
The Enemy of Excellence is “Good Enough”
Time and time again I see parents setting the bar so LOW for their child to the point that there is no possibility of failure. When I ask them why they aim so low, the most common response is, "I don’t want them to fail at anything."
An example of this happened to me some time ago. Jeff was a little 4 year old bundle of energy. His mom had brought him in for a trial class to my program. Well, Jeff was just a terror. He would not listen to any instructions, he would touch, poke and push the other children in class, and if he did not feel like doing what the class was doing, he would simply walk off the training floor or lay
down right where he was and start to sing out loud.
Now, I have dealt with this type of child before. What I was not prepared for was his mother. After class had ended, Jeff ran over to mom who immediately said, "Jeff you did such a GREAT job out
there. I think we should go to McDonald’s and get you that Happy Meal you like so much."
I was left standing there wondering if mom watched class at all. Jeff was completely out of control, and now mom is going to reward that behavior because he "tried".
Character is created from the experiences we have. By removing possible negative experiences from your child’s life, you are doing harm to their future.
By setting the bar too low, and over exaggerating small accomplishments, you are teaching your child what is the acceptable standard. More often then not, a parent’s standard is not what society will accept. Here lies the trouble.
One example is watching a group of children playing with a variety of toys. One child decides they want the toy another one is currently playing with, so they walk over, grab the toy, and push the other child down. Now, if the parent does not step in and teach the child that this behavior is not acceptable, the child will naturally continue with this behavior. This selfishness then grows into a much bigger problem later on once the child becomes a teenager.
Another example that comes to mind is school. A child that has never been taught to exceed their goals will accept a grade of a C or D because it means they passed. In their mind, the goal was
accomplished. But look at the long term effect of this thinking:
They are unlikely to be accepted at a college with such low grades.
Without going to college, the number of job opportunities is cut way down.
The limited number of jobs they can get are not going to pay very well, so they are now forced to find a 2nd job just to get by.
Can you see where this negative cycle is going? Now think back to the beginning….where did this all start?
WITH YOU!! The parent who wanted to keep any type of failure from their child has now doomed them to a mediocre lifestyle at best.
Give your child the skills to be as successful as they can be. Do not accept "Good Enough" from yourself or them. Any time you find yourself saying, "Well that is ‘good enough’." Immediately stop
and examine it to decide what has to be done to make it GREAT!
Now, use this new skill together with my other tip "Every Experience Results in a Positive Life Skill", and you and your child will see a lot of opportunities open up that you would have missed
before.
